Friday, April 21, 2006

The true sound of fat-loss pills

Okay, it's nearly 1 in the morning.. or evening. Whichever you want to call it, I should be sleeping right now, but I'm doing a little last minute studying before my exams tomorrow morning. After briefly resurrecting my blogging, it died off going into exam period here, but after tomorrow I'm home-free & will hopefully be posting more regularly.

However, it's very late & I just read a little blurb on a proposed OTC (over-the-counter) fat loss pill that is currently under review by the FDA. It's a fat-blocker called Alli and it works in much the same way as other pills you may have seen advertised on TV, right around this time of day. It blocks up to 1/3 of the fat you consume from being absorbed, so you consume the same # of calories, but actually absorb a smaller number. However, it's prone to many of the usually side effects associated with this type of pill which, while probably not terribly harmful to you long term, are also probably not worth the trouble. Side effects may include: "abdominal cramping, oily stools, and rampant bouts of wet, uncontrollable, "chainsaw-like" flatulence ripping through the seat of their elastic-waisted pants like the tusks of a wild boar tearing through rotted cheesecloth." (not my words, although I wish they had been)

I read this description and had a true moment of clarity: Chris, we have finally uncovered the secret to your svelte & shapely curves! Since you have clearly been taking this product since 1993 at the latest, I suggest you contact Xenical (the company manufacturing it) and demand compensation.

Wednesday, April 05, 2006

It's just a little late, it's still good!

So, probably 3 weeks ago now, calvin 'tagged' me & although I did read the post, by the time I got to the last entry I think my mind had already moved on to something else & I didn't even realize that I was supposed to keep the thing going... oops!

So, better late than never:

Four jobs I’ve had
"Sports Advisor" (aka. SportChek guy)
"Golf club Draft beer & Burger Technician" (aka guy you buy beer & food from after 9 holes)
Bartender (aka Bartender)
Restaurant Manager (aka guy who gives you the free stuff when you complain)

Four movies I can watch over and over
Braveheart
Ace Ventura: Pet Detective
Meet the Parents
The Matrix (any one of em)

Four places I have lived
Concord, Ontario
Newmarket, Ontario
London, Ontario
Surfers Paradise, Australia (breifly)

Four TV shows I love to watch
LOST
Prison Break
Daily Show
Sopranos

Four places I have been on vacation
Australia
New Zealand
Florida
Ottawa

Four websites I visit daily
T-Nation
Soccernet
Mercola's Health Blog
YOUR website!

Four of my favourite foods
Fall off the bone, Back Ribs
Organic Royal Gala apples
Sea Scallops
Milk

Four places I would rather be right now
Cycling anywhere in Europe
At the Human Kinetics bookstore with a pocket full of cash
Playing soccer
In Cairns, reading on the beach with a Toohey's New in one hand & a Kangaroo steak in the other (...but how would I hold the book?)

Four bloggers I am tagging
Everybody I want to hear from has posted already, so I'm gonna let this be a dead end